The Presence of the Holy Spirit Part 1

On the day William was taken to surgery to donate his organs, his mother and I were blessed to be able to say our final goodbyes. We took a moment together in grief and both felt the urge to escape. In an anxiety driven mode we packed all of our belongings and gifts we had received that week in bags the hospital staff had given us and proceeded toward the door.

Will's mother, Kacey, stopped and I heard her say, "Tony". I turned and I saw such a peace on her face that I had not seen in a long time. I knew what she was thinking because I felt the same way. I asked her, "You do not want to leave do you?"

She said, "No, This has been one of the best experiences in my life."

How in the world could we, having just lost our son, feel that way?

2 Corinthians 4: 7-10

But we have this treasure in clay jars, so that it may be clear that this extraordinary power belongs to God and does not come from us. We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be made visible in our mortal flesh.

We felt that way because of the tremendous outpouring of prayer from around the world.
We felt that way because the power of the Holy Spirit was concentrated on that little room.
We felt that way because we were aware of His presence in a big way in our humble lives.

I think Wesley sums it up

"He proceeds to show, that affliction, yea, death itself, are so far from hindering the ministrations of the Spirit, that they even further it, sharpens the ministries and increases the fruit. That the excellence of the power, which works them in us. may undeniably appear to be God."

That has been revealed to me as truth, that in the midst of chaos and death, God steps in and calms the storm. Putting a stranglehold on death and calming our fears. Through my son's death the power of the Holy Spirit became tangible to me and we were blessed!

Next week I will continue the story of His presence in our lives. As the continuing prayers lifted marinate our earthly existence, the lives of others are being touched. The power of the Spirit is racing ahead and the passion that has been ignited in our hearts speaks to the continuing legacy of Christ through my son Will.

A Grieving Father Reflects on the Cross

I am posting a blog that I had on the page, Prayers for Will Smith. I am going to be blogging on a weekly basis but this has apparently touched several people and I want to reshare. For those who have already seen it, it may look a little more refined. For others, I hope my life experiences can offer some"good news'. I pray that my sharing of despair and victory will touch a cord in all who walk with me and we can journey down this road together triumphantly.

Original post was on April 18th, 2014. I reflected on a Good Friday Service and the theatrical representation of the final days in the life of Jesus Christ.

Mark 14: 34-36
And he said to them, I am deeply grieved, even to death; remain here, and keep awake." And going a little farther he threw himself on the ground and prayed that if at all possible, the hour might pass from him. He said, "Abba, Father, for you all things are possible; remove this cup from me; yet, not what I want, but what you want."

I sat and watched an actor lift up the prayer, "Take this cup from me." I saw the same actor hung on a cross in remembrance of the agony that Jesus suffered. I saw the people at the cross praying and I saw the last three weeks flash before me. 

                        
William was all through the service tonight and I reflected back on some of the experiences I had. 

One in particular came to mind. On the day we were waiting for the second test I got to pray a supernatural prayer. One in which I fervently prayed for Will's healing. During that moment I realized I was taking authority for my son's life. I understood that my son was covered under my protection under the blood of Christ. I remember seeing a gray veil over his body that I prayed away and then I envisioned a white light growing inside my son's brain. Looking back I realize that I was given the privilege of ushering my son into the arms of God. I believe William received the ultimate healing in that moment and that has defined the blessing in the days that have followed.

Tonight I felt the sacrifice that was made for us. I understand praying for the outcome to be different and getting a different kind of blessing. I also understand what a father feels to release his son. Our heavenly Father loves us more than I could ever love my son, yet he released his only son on the cross to face the darkness. I can only imagine what that sacrifice really means. 

Thank You HUMC for a powerful night!

In the days following that night at church, I  I have begun to realize how much I have grown over the last several years. I have gone from despair to blessings even while suffering  a tragic event. I am beginning to understand what the other side of Good Friday looks like. 

I am awake into the victorious life of Christ

Continuing the Story

I heard another story today of a life Will has touched. A man walking the neighborhood, stopped my mother in the driveway and expressed his  anger that he had felt concerning what happened to Will. He said he had spent time with his parish priest about this and was able to come to a better understanding. He told my mother that he remembers Will in the driveway riding his tricycle and when he spoke to him Will responded back by saying "Hope you have a good day. Ever since that day this man pictures Will and his interaction with him. His story also led this man to seek Spiritual guidance from someone and has come to a better understanding of life and death. 

Ironically,  today I was led to a passage in 2 Corinthians that discusses the paradox between life and death. (2 Corinthians 4:7-5:10).

The following is a part of that passage:

2 Corinthians 4:11-15

For while we live, we are always being given up to death for Jesus' sake, so that the life of Jesus may be made visible in our mortal flesh. So death is at work in us, but life in you. 

But just as we have the same spirit of faith that is in accordance with scripture-"I believed, and so I spoke"-we also believe, and so we speak, because we know that the one who raised the Lord Jesus will also raise us with Jesus, and will bring us with you into his presence. Yes, everything is for your sake, so that grace, as it extends to more and more people, may increase thanksgiving, to the glory of God.

I am in awe at the happenstance surrounding the continuing story about Will and his life. I know that as we move forward in life that his physical presence will become more and more just a memory. That is where my grief lies. I am proud however to have the opportunity to carry the message of God to others. The "Good News" I have experienced through my life with my son.

William's life and legacy will always be apart of me and I vow to carry that with honor. That is what this blog is about. A little boy who loved life, grieving parents and friends who were touched by this beautiful child and strangers who walked this walk with us all have a part in this story. 

The story of Jesus and the church is just that sort of walk. Through death, others come to understand faith and grace. Others will get the chance to live. not just in the physical, thanks to donations of organs, but through pain and struggles all come to a better understanding of what real living is all about. That is my goal for my son. 

Peace and Blessings to All,

Tony